TOP 21 BITS OF TRIVIA YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT DAVE KRAFT
21) Ernie pushed him. (WAY TO GO ERNIE!)
20) He's been known to golf in pumps.
19) He may not be able to drink as many Coors Lights as Roger,
but it's still not going to stop him from trying.
18) He's too short to look good in a thong.
17) The only reason he can win anything at the RCM (Green Jacket,
yeah right) is because he sets his own handicap.
16) Back in his high school years, he was a convicted mail
box basher, which is a felony in all 50 states.
15) After you've played poker and discussed game rules with the
guy for a few hours, you would swear that he was a lawyer.
14) It's not a real mustache, but a combination of rubber
cement and hair from his back.
13) He's the first one to give you golf tips as he's beating
the bushes looking for his ball.
12) He's the only guy at the RCM who wants to grow up to be
like his younger brother.
11) He only has one (1) eyebrow.
10) When he walks barefoot in his EEE wide feet, he has a
striking resemblance to a pregnant platypus.
9) He doesn't know if his father was the mailman or the heating
oil delivery guy.
8) The same guy who ran the tournament and tallied the scores
took home the jacket in 2000. Coincidence?
7) When Roger dies, his first agenda item will be to stack the
committee and rename the tournament to The Dave Kraft
Memorial Golf Tournament.
6) He has Donny Koran's hose.
5) If he ever applied to join the Escondido Country Club,
he would be denied membership.
4) He's the only Security Member that needed a special order
shirt (that includes Porter and Dubo).
3) He's the only guy to attempt to break Karl's consectutive
"safety meeting" record of 8 (his wife cut short his attempt).
2) His proudest possession is his Electric Beer Can
Crusher (.034 seconds per can), and when he shows it
off, he gets excited as a rabid gerbil in heat.
1) He's the only committee member not to get into Roger's
shorts. Roger has standards you know.
If you have something to add to this list, please email
Racer (Dan Kraft) at: dkraft@doh.com
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